Monster: a mobius poem

by Risa Mykland

I’m dreaming of / dark closets
Dark closets / hold a monster
Hold a monster / who doesn’t care about me
Who doesn’t care about me / but the darkness?
But the darkness / swallows
Swallows / were
Were / a sailor’s good omen
A sailor’s good omen / was
Was / usually about land
Usually about land / there are homes
There are homes / that which we long for
That which we long for / in our dreams
In our dreams / there is a closet
There is a closet / where I am sitting
Where I am sitting / is the corner
Is the corner / where I am not cared about
Where I am not cared about / has always felt like home
Has always felt like home / like
Like / like I swallow
Like I swallow / the acid
The acid / you put at the back of my throat
You put at the back of my throat / every reminder that you are the monster
Every reminder that you are the monster / has a flip-side
Has a flip-side / in your eyes
In your eyes / I see ocean blue
I see ocean blue / knowing I am far from home
Knowing I am far from home / is walking the plank
Is walking the plank / all that scary?
All that scary / even with a net underneath?
Even with a net underneath / it is a plummet
It is a plummet / to believe you will be caught
To believe you will be caught / you have to trust
You have to trust / you have to trust
You have to trust / in the monsters
In the monsters / in the ocean
In the ocean / there is a monster
There is a monster / in the closet
In the closet / I can’t hear you
I can’t hear you / anymore
Any more / would kill me
Would kill me / but
but / when the door opens
When the door opens / there are only the clear skies
There are only the clear skies / I’m dreaming of.

Risa Mykland (she/they) is a poet and self-proclaimed special occasion, currently based in Portland, OR. Her poetry opens conversation about mental health, abuse, the various ways we can feel grief, and all the healing and growth that comes with those experiences. She has been described as relatable and passionate. Find her work at @precisespice on Instagram, or at Risa Kate Poetry on Facebook. When not doing poetry you can find her thinking about poetry.

 

Photography by: Charles Deluvio